revising ordinary sentences into strong leads, then launching an original story that uses them.
This lesson was built for WritingFix after being proposed by Nevada teacher Jenelle Sumrall at an AT&T-sponsored in-service class for teachers.
The intended "mentor text" to be used when teaching this on-line lesson is the chapter book Crispin: the Cross of Lead by Avi. Before writing, students should listen to and discuss the writing style of this book's author, especially from chapter 1 of the book.
If you are a Washoe County teacher, click here to search for this book at the county library.
Teacher Instructions & Lesson Resources :
Pre-step…before sharing the published model: Avi is a great writer who captures his readers' attention in each and every one of his chapters by starting with a strong introduction. For this lesson, the mentor text is Crispin: The Cross of Lead. This is a book set in the middle ages and addresses the lifestyle and conflicts of daily living including the black plague and political instability. You may want to discuss this historical setting with your students so they have a better context for the chapter introductions you can share with students.
Step one (sharing the published model): You will need a copy of Crispin: The Cross of Lead. Before reading from chapter one, write this sentence on the board: “They went to a funeral.”
Ask the students what they pictured in their minds when you wrote this down. Answers will vary because of students' variety of experiences. Then read Chapter one, paragraph one in Crispin: The Cross of Lead.
Then ask the students what they picture in their minds now. Why are the pictures different? (You can also read other great chapter leads in this book. They are all great.) Finally ask, "What makes an introduction to a story something that your reader wants to continue reading." Lead the discussion towards description words –adjectives, adverbs, action verbs. Says Jenelle, "I call them power words, and I tell my students that I am tired of hearing Once upon a time... and One day I... because they are boring. No one wants to read that.
Tell students they will be revising a boring lead today so that they can use it to start and original and exciting story.
Step two (introducing student models of writing): In small groups, have your students read and respond to any or all of the student models that come with this lesson. The groups will certainly talk about the organization, since that's the focus of this lesson, but you might also have your students talk about the word choice in the writing too.
We're looking for student samples for all grade levels for this prompt! Help us get some, and we'll send you a free resource for your classroom! Contact us at publish@writingfix.com for details.
Step three (thinking and pre-writing):The Interactive Button Game on the Student Instructions Page has boring ideas for leads that students can select to revise. If students would rather create their own boring leads, then exchange with friends to revise, that certainly works too.
You might also share with your students--as past of their learning process--these popular handouts from the WritingFix website; both are about the importance of using strong introductions.
Have students take their chosen boring leads, and create three or four alternatives. They can, then, share all the alternatives with a small group, and the group can help them choose the best. The worksheet below will help them craft these alternative lead ideas:
Step four (revising with specific trait language): To promote response and revision to rough draft writing, attach WritingFix's Revision and Response Post-Its to your students' drafts. Make sure the students rank their use of the trait-specific skills on the Post-Its, which means they'll only have one "1" and one "5." Have them commit to ideas for revision based on their Post-It rankings. For more ideas on WritingFix's Revision & Response Post-Its, click here.
Step five (editing for conventions): After students apply their revision ideas to their drafts and re-write neatly, require them to find an editor. If you've established a "Community of Editors" among your students, have each student exchange his/her paper with multiple peers. With yellow high-lighters in hand, each peer reads for and highlights suspected errors for just one item from the Editing Post-it. The "Community of Editors" idea is just one of dozens and dozens of inspiring ideas that is talked about in detail in the Northern Nevada Writing Project's Going Deep with 6 Trait Language Workbook for Teachers.
Step six (publishing for the portfolio): When they are finished revising and have second drafts, invite your students to come back to this piece once more during an upcoming writer's workshop block. Their stories might become a longer story, a more detailed piece, or the beginning of a series of pieces about the story they started here. Students will probably enjoy creating an illustration for this story as they get ready to publish it for their portfolios.
Interested in publishing student work on-line? We invite student writers to post final drafts of their original at WritingFix's Community of Student Writers. This is a safe-to-use blog for students and teachers. No writing is posted until it is approved by the moderator. Contact us at publish@writingfix.com if you have questions about getting your students published.
