An I-Pod Inspired Writing Lesson from WritingFix
Focus Trait: IDEA DEVELOPMENT Support Trait: VOICE

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With Your Own Two Hands

Writing a "Change the World" Poem after analyzing artists' points-of-view

A song by Ben Harper is inspiring student writers to try new techniques with the traits of idea development and voice.

You can publish up to three of your students' edited and finished stories at this page.

Use these samples to inspire your student writers! Discussing the strengths of published student samples before, while, and after using this on-line assignment is important. If your students are engaged in trait- or skill-inspired discussions about any of the samples we've posted here, they will produce better writing, especially if you help them take their writing all the way through the writing process.

Thank you, those who share their students' writing with us.


Additional Student Samples Being Sought:
Grades 3 and 6

Learn more about WritingFix's policies for publishing student work by visiting our Publishing Student Writers Information Page.

WritingFix is currently seeking additional student samples from this writing assignment that can be featured in this space. Submitted student work must show evidence of revision, editing, and the final draft must be typed and sent through e-mail. Teachers: if you can help us obtain one, two or three student samples, along with a digital photo of the student(s) and a signed permission slips, we will send you either a complimentary copy of one of the Northern Nevada Writing Project's print publications.

To have us consider your students' writing for inclusion on this page, you must post the writing to our Ning page dedicated to this lesson. Click here to access that page. You must first be a member of the Writing Lesson of the Month Network in order to post.

Student Samples: Elementary

I Can Change the World…
by Liam, fourth grade poet

The world is passing by,
I see many sad things and
I ask “Why?”

Why must there be war
when there should be peace?

Drugs are everywhere
when minds should be clean.

Pollution and waste are all around.
The earth, it needs to breathe.

I can do my part.
I’ll need your help.
That’s a good start…

Let’s change the world.


(Click here to open/print Liam and three of his classmates' poems.)


One Day
by Ruth, by fifth grade poet

One day the war will stop
With one single smile.

One day pollution will stop
Because someone made a speech. 

One day all crimes will stop
Because someone gives a hug.

And one day peace
Will come to be
With everything nice,
Quiet and happy.
Everything will be all right.

So help search for happiness!


(Click here to open/print Ruth and five of her classmates' poems.)


Student Samples: Middle School

My Own Two Hands
by Jadie, seventh grade poet

Two Hands
Changing the World?
Come on, what can two hands
Basically do to change the world?
Two hands are much more powerful
Than you think.
Beethoven’s music…
Two hands.
The Mona Lisa painting,
Leonardo Da Vinci…
Two hands.
Each and every one of us can make a
Massive difference…
With our two hands.
Be the change.
Make a difference.

(Click here to view and print Jadie and five of her classmates' poems)


Right Now, Right Here
by Audrey, eighth grade poet

I think I can change the world,
that I can help a friend,
or plant a tree.
I think I could be more kind,
say something nice,
to someone else.
It’s not so hard,
like everyone says,

My voice will make a
statement.
My hands will make a
difference.
My spirit will lift a
nation.

I know I can change the world
right now,
right here.
I can do it.

 

(More eighth grade samples can be found at this teacher's website.)


Student Samples: High School

How Will WE!! Change the World?
by Nathan, ninth grade poet

To Change the World
We need to group together.
It’s like a bird, cold,
Trying to keep warm with one feather.
We need to clench hands
And make peace with each other.
Treat every man
Like he is your own brother.
We need to take look
At our planet in a swirl,
And think twice
How will WE!! change the world?

(Click here to view and print Nathan and two of his classmates' poems)


If Only I Can Change the World
by Ronald, tenth grade poet

We must act now and not later
for too long the problem will grow greater
be joyful be sorrow
for there might not be tomorrow
no night no morning
all because of Global Warming
If only I can change the world

No war no violence
for all there will be is silence
moms yelling children crying
for everyone is dying
no families no wives
if we continue to kill lives
If only I can change the world

Money spent money earn
but we never learn
too much is too much
but for some there is no such
money received money refused
it is something we all abuse
If only I can change the world

Poor or wealth
it depends on what we are dealt
no food no home
all we can do is roam
hunger that you cannot bare
but the thing is that no one cares
If only I can change the world

People come people go
but no all of us know
the world is rapidly evolving
and what we need is problem solving
this planet needs a lot of change
and these are in anyone’s range

I can change the world


Uninvented Revolution
by
Lauren, eleventh grade poet

You may be
one
in a million but it only takes
one
to revolutionize or blast into oblivion.
Either way, the sun will set and the day
is done.

What your weapon is, all depends
music, pen or voice
decades will come to an end
you can influence the future
with your choice.

In the big or small world,
impact varies by magnitude
your vision can make
something painted black
something painted blue.

You can balance us, land us, or break us.
Make life colorful or black and white.
The drive to expand turns to lust
the world will be frightened or blessed at night.

Emotions are drawn by music and
memories painted by words
determination fueling against every hit
you can sail your ship or submerge.

You may be
one
in a million but it only takes
one
to revolutionize or blast into oblivion.
Either way, the sun will set and the day
is done.

(Click here to view and print Lauren and five of her classmates' poems)


If I Was President
by Jarell, twelfth grade poet

If I was President,
I’d be elected on Friday,
change the world on Saturday,
be assassinated on Sunday,
if I was President.**

If I was President,
I’d stop the hatred of nations,
begin the healing of friendships,
invite the love of forgiveness,
if I was President.

If I was President,
we would all see as Dalmatians,
we’d accept the merging of races,
we’d embrace the love of all faces,
if I was President.

If I was president,
there’d be an end to starvation,
a building of positive inspiration,
and the rising of translation,
if I was President.

After I am president,
we’d have the beginning of tomorrow,
the unity that we starve for,
so say goodbye to the sorrow,
because I was President.

 

**Jarrell was further inspired by a Wyclef Jean song when he composed his poem.

(Click here to view and print Jarell and 5 of his classmates' poems)


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